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Saturday, December 5th, 2009
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11:40 am - Writer's Block: 2012
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Celebrating my father's 82nd birthday and wishing him many more years of life. I'm sure he'll outlive us all.
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| Monday, November 30th, 2009
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11:46 pm - The Last Eight Pics
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Hardly anyone commented on my pics from last night. I thought the shots I took of and from Sandia Peak were just magnificent and I was surprised that they didn’t get more response. It almost tempts me to not post the last eight shots (out of 40), but I’ll go ahead and do it anyway since they are all part of the same set. I’ll just pretend people are interested.
Anyway, in going over these pics, I realized I never made a post about my last day in New Mexico when I climbed a volcano. (It was part of Petroglyph National Monument. There were five ancient volcanoes but I only had time to climb one, since I got there late in the day and there was only an hour left of daylight. The dead volcanoes last erupted 150,000 years ago, before homo-sapiens, as we know us, even existed. It was a steep and difficult climb, and twice I almost slipped and fell, but the view was amazing and well worth it.)
I also never got a chance to write about anything else that happened in the last week, except for Thanksgiving. I had an interesting flight from NM to FL. (My bag got damaged, Miss Teen New Mexico was on board and got a round of applause from the passengers, and a couple who was sitting across from me, I suspect, joined the “Mile High Club.”) And here in Florida, over the passed week, I had nice visits with my friends Ben, Ben, and Elizabeth. I enjoyed spending time with my family. And today I went again to the federal prison and visited my friend Kris.
I fly back to Virginia on Wednesday. By the time I get back, I will have been gone five weeks. That’s far too long. I am really anxious to get back home.
Anyway, here now are the last eight pics, like ‘em or not.
This photo was taken in the Anderson-Abruzzo Albuquerque International Balloon Museum. This is a model of one of the first balloons. It’s French and flew in the very late 18th Century. I’m sorry I’m not sure exactly what flag the figure is waving, but it has a white background and has three blue fleur-de-lis. Perhaps some of my friends who are really into French history (I’m talking to you, Siobhan) can help identify it.
Also in the balloon museum, they had miniature models of many of the balloons which flew in the famous Albuquerque Balloon Fiesta. I was particularly drawn to this one, which has the red Zia sign against a yellow background, because that is the symbol of New Mexico. (I also kind of liked the one immediately behind it with the Coke logo.)
This is the path leading to the volcano that I climbed. This particular volcano was designated JA. From a distance, it doesn’t look so bad, but trust me, it really is quite the steep and high climb.
The view from the top of JA volcano. There are tons of volcanic rocks up there. Here, I’m looking east, toward Albuquerque and the Sandias. The setting sun is directly behind me which is why you can see my shadow.
Another view from the top, this one looking toward the southeast.
One last view from the top, before heading back down. This is looking westward at the trail I just traveled. From this angle, the way the pic is cropped, you can’t see the trail on the volcano, but you can see from about where it meets the foot of the volcano and heads back out to the trailhead. (About a mile.)
I’ve walked about half-way back to the car. You can see a bit of the volcano on the right side of the photo and the Sandias way off in the distance. In the foreground is a cactus.
Final shot. About five minutes before sunset. A huge cactus way out in the middle of the field, and the mountains way off, probably about 20 miles away.
So that’s that. I hope you liked my pics.
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12:20 am - Pics from Sandia Peak
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Here is the second set (of three) of pics from my NM trip. I picked out sixteen from the day Debbie and I took the tram to Sandia Peak. (I took 120 pics that day, so narrowing it down to 16 was quite a task.) While I enjoyed everything on the NM trip, I think it’s fair to say that Sandia Peak was the highlight. Words can’t really describe how amazing it was, but I hope these pics can help explain.
This photo was taken on the tram (which is basically a cable car) as we left the lower terminal. We just started our assent up the western side of the mountain. (The lower terminal is at 6500 feet above sea level and the upper terminal, at the summit, is at 10,300 feet above sea level.)
In this photo, we just passed the first tower. If you see some little fuzzy spots, that’s dirt or reflection on the tram window.
We passed this rocky mountain face on the way up.
The two trams—one going up and one going down—pass each other just above the second tower. I’m not sure how obvious it is from the photo, but here I’m looking backwards, only moments after the downward tram passed us.
Another view on the way up. Isn’t this gorgeous? How can you look at this and not lose your breath?
This photo was taken from the summit, looking northeastward. I believe those are the snowcapped Sangri de Christos Mountains way off in the distance, near Santa Fe, about 60 miles away.
The view from the top looking westward. You can see the city of Albuquerque below (in the left-center part of the photo).
Looking northward.
The summit, looking toward the northeast.
The peak, looking toward the south.
Looking down, southwest, upon the city of Albuquerque.
Looking straight down the ridge, southward.
Looking southeast, at the town of Tijeras, and the smaller mountains beyond it.
Oooh; I like this pic. I stood at the upper tram terminal, right in between the two sets of cables; one going up and one going down. You can easily see the cables going to the second tower, on that ridge, before they disappear below it. Beyond that, you can see the city of Albuquerque. And if you have good eyes, slightly to the right and above the center of the photo, you can see some of the Rio Grande twisting along, like a blue ribbon.
Now we’ve gotten into the tram and are descending the mountain. I am looking back up toward the upper terminal.
One last shot, from the ride down. Isn’t this just magnificent?
I just have a few more pics from the trip; I’ll post them later.
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| Saturday, November 28th, 2009
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11:55 pm - The First Set of Pics from New Mexico
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I took over 500 photos when I was in New Mexico. It’s taken me a while to try to narrow down which ones to post for my friends because I know you don’t want to see 500.
I’ve picked out 40 to share. But even that is too many for a single viewing, so we’ll start with 16. I hope you like them.
This is a photo of the Sandia Mountains which stand guard over Albuquerque. There are many views of the mountains similar to this one from many places in the city. However this particular shot was taken on my way to my family’s land in Rio Rancho.
This is a photo of the land my family owns, way out in the middle of the desert. In the foreground, on the right, is a dirt road. Way, way, way off in the distance you can see powerlines. Between the road and the powerlines is nothing. And if you turned around and did a 180, you’d still see nothing, except way, way, way off in the distance you’d see the Sandia Mountains, but much, much smaller than in the previous pic. The land is 16 miles from the center of town.
Another shot of the land. Okay, to say there is “nothing” on it is not quite true. There are cacti.
New Mexico is known for, among other things, spectacular sunsets. I saw quite a few from my hotel window. This pic is one of the best.
This is me in the Northeastern Heights, probably the nicest and most exclusive area of Albuquerque. It’s right up against the mountains. This is a self-portrait.
Remember I described climbing Boca Negra Canyon in Petroglyph National Monument? In this pic, I’m pretty high up, though not quite to the top. From here you get a pretty good idea of what the canyon looks like. If you look closely, on the big, black rock that is jutting out in the center, you can see a petroglyph of an animal. Also, in the lower left corner, you can see a man climbing the path—that can help give you a perspective on the size of this thing.
There are literally over 20,000 petroglyphs in the park. I saw maybe 100 or more and took pics of about two dozen. Not all of them came out so great. But of those that did, this is one of the ones that most interested me because here you can see human figures.
This is the view, near the top. One side of the canyon backs up against what is now a residential development. So here, I am looking eastwards, across Albuquerque, toward the Sandias.
This is the church of San Felipe de Neri, the oldest surviving building in Albuquerque. It was built by the Spanish settlers in 1706. They were Catholic.
This is in Santa Fe. This is the Palace of the Governors, the main building of the city, which housed governors from 1620 to 1912. Underneath the overhang are rows of Native Americans selling their jewelry and other hand-made crafts.
This is the courtyard inside the Palace of the Governors. To the left is the entrance to what is now the Museum of New Mexico.
Remember I wrote that Debbie and I took the Rail Runner train from Albuquerque to Santa Fe? Well, this was taken on the train ride back. I think it’s a really good shot of Debbie.
Debbie took this pic of me on the train.
This is the entrance to the Indian Pueblo Cultural Center.
One of the best displays inside the IPCC was a temporary exhibit by Native American artist Kathleen Wall. She sculpted many clay figures and this one was one of my favorites. Obviously, it shows a potter talking with her friend. I particularly liked this sculpture.
In the courtyard of the IPCC, there were several giant murals by Native American artists. This one was my favorite.
Well, that’s it for now. I hope you enjoyed these. There will be more pics later.
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| Friday, November 27th, 2009
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12:56 am - What I am Thankful for
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I’d like to expand, a bit, on my post of earlier today.
When I was a kid, Thanksgiving was one of my two favorite holidays (the other being the Fourth of July). I always enjoyed gathering with family and friends and having a home-cooked feast. And I did appreciate the opportunity to count my blessings, to take a moment and appreciate all the goodness in my life. Whether it came from God, or if it was by random chance, or if it was the product of my own sweat and talent, it was important for me to stop and smell the roses and really be thankful for all that was good in my life, to not take it for granted.
Every Thanksgiving evening, I guess starting when I was 16 or 17, I would write a list of everything I had to be thankful for. But somewhere along the line, maybe a dozen years ago, maybe a little more, that little personal tradition died away. But tonight I’d like to revive that.
Especially now, this year, 2009, it has become very important to me. Because recently, especially over the summer, I was counting my curses. I was getting obsessed with everything that was going wrong in my life. And I think Thanksgiving is an excellent opportunity to counter that with a really positive, personal message to myself.
But I don’t mind sharing it with you, my friends. So here is my list:
- Topping off the list, I am grateful for renewed health. My tinnitus has improved much in the last few months. I still have bad days, but they are outnumbered by good days. And while I have come to accept the possibility that I may never be fully cured and I may never hear total silence again, I realize that this is something I can live with. I’ve learned coping strategies. I’m able to get on with life. And even enjoy life, at least parts of it, again. Suicidal thoughts are long gone.
- I’m thankful for my loving and supportive family. In so many ways, they have gone way out of their way to help me and have sacrificed for my sake. I sometimes think I don’t deserve such a wonderful family that does so much for me.
- I’m glad that my friend Kris has gone out of the fire and into the frying pan. Sure, the frying pan is a pretty horrible place to be, but it’s a hell of a lot better than the fire.
- I’m thankful for the 18 wonderful days I just spent in New Mexico. (Yes, I promise, pics coming soon.)
- I’m thankful for my friendship with Debbie. Despite our breakup, I’m very glad that we can both be adult about it and continue to be good friends. I can’t imagine her not being in my life, and I’m grateful that she still is.
- I’m thankful that my financial situation has improved greatly since last winter. For a while, I was really worried, but the market has come back nicely and I can breathe a sigh of relief.
- I’m thankful for the cooler, drier weather. I feel much better in this weather.
- I’m thankful that I was able to get my website going again after a four month hiatus. It’s too soon to know if the new format, reviewing only Jewish films, will be successful. But at least I enjoy it, and that’s the most important thing.
- I’m glad that I am an active member of the Jewish Film Festival committee. It’s fun previewing films and putting together the festival. I’m really looking forward to the festival in April.
- I’m thankful for all my friends who have been so supportive of me during my recent difficulties. Both real life friends, as well as on-line friends on LJ and FB. In a way, it almost amazes me how close I feel to some people I have never met in real life: Teri, Leska, David, Ana, Chris, Sean, Erin, Gina, Keith, Brian, Carol, Oscar, and Sarah. They’re just as important to me as real life friends like Ben, Ben, Barry, Debbie, Kris, Russ, Susan, Carol, Elizabeth, Sean, Sharon, and Dana.
- And finally, I’m thankful for this holiday, today. We had eight people—the most we have had for Thanksgiving in quite a few years. It was a wonderful gathering of family and good friends. And a great home-cooked feast of roast turkey, stuffing, gravy, cranberry sauce, pickles, fresh green beans, a nice salad with olives, home-baked rolls, cider to drink, and homemade apple and pumpkin pies for dessert. My father’s been cooking for the last three days. And you know what, it was definitely worth it.
Looking back over this list, I feel truly blessed. And that’s saying lot, considering how cursed I felt only a few months ago.
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| Thursday, November 26th, 2009
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10:23 am - Happy Thanksgiving!!
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Happy Thanksgiving to all my friends. May you be blessed and may you appreciate all your blessings.
Considering all the sh*t I’ve been through in the last year, I’m particularly grateful for my blessings this year. My wonderful, loving family is on the top of that list.
(Photos from New Mexico coming soon. I took over 500—it’s quite a job to pick out only a few to share with LJ.)
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| Friday, November 20th, 2009
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9:55 pm - Six Days with Debbie in New Mexico
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ALBUQUERQUE, NM. — Ever since I had first met Debbie, I had been telling her about how much I had loved New Mexico when I was here five years ago. We had spoken in vague terms, several times, about coming out here one day. And when I realized a few months ago that the drier climate might be much better for my tinnitus, that was the impetus for us to make our plans.
Of course, what we didn’t foresee was the breakup five weeks ago. But despite that, we decided to go ahead with our plans and meet up out here anyway. The only difference was that it would be for a shorter time, and that Debbie would be staying at her own hotel, across the street.
So things basically went pretty well. With the exception of a few, brief, awkward moments, we got along great as platonic friends. We enjoyed each other’s company, as we always did, and had a lot of fun doing all the great tourist things to do out here. Each evening, we went our separate ways, to our own hotels. Overall, I was quite pleased. And I hope Debbie can say the same.
So Debbie came on Wednesday, November 11 and left the following Wednesday, the 18th. That gave us six full days in between to have some fun.
Thursday the 12th we went to Old Town Albuquerque. This is the oldest section of the city which was founded in 1706. It’s very pretty. It has a center square, like most Spanish towns, and all kinds of interesting art galleries and gift shops. Some of them hidden in cute courtyards. We went into many of them and enjoyed admiring the Southwestern and Native American artwork and talking to friendly proprietors. We bought a few souvenirs.
We found a nice pizza place where we had lunch. We spent a while in the Visitor’s Center. And we also checked out the Church of San Felipe de Neri, the oldest surviving building in Albuquerque. It’s a Catholic Church and is still an active congregation to this day. We went inside; it was very interesting. It had an 18th Century, Spanish feel to it.
Friday the 13th we went to the National Museum of Nuclear Science and History. Albuquerque is an appropriate place for this museum since it is in between two of the most important sites in nuclear history: Los Alamos, NM, where the atomic bomb was developed, and Alamogordo, NM, where the first nuclear explosion took place, in 1945.
They had all kinds of interesting exhibits on early nuclear science, the Manhattan Project, the bombing of Hiroshima, and the Cold War. There was a brief movie that showed a nuclear bomb explosion. When it went off, the ground shook, the lights came up brightly, and a fan blew wind in our faces.
There were missiles and bomber planes and exhibits of nuclear energy and alternatives to it. There was a cute play-area for kids with a muppet-like Einstein who answered questions, and a very interesting display on nuclear culture with comic books and all kinds of products with atomic themes. There was also an exhibit on medical science that uses nuclear technology, such as x-rays and cat-scans.
They also showed a very interesting documentary in their theatre about the Manhattan Project—Debbie and I were the only ones in there, so we got a private screening.
Saturday the 14th we went to Santa Fe, the capital of New Mexico, which is 60 miles north of Albuquerque. We almost didn’t go because I wasn’t crazy about driving, due to my tinnitus, but when we learned about the “Rail Runner” train, which didn’t exist five years ago the last time I was here, it sounded like a great alternative. And it was. For only six dollars a piece (less than we would have had to pay for gas and parking), we got a very pleasant ride up to Santa Fe, passing through some absolutely beautiful desert landscape.
There’s a free shuttle that takes you from the train station to the Plaza (the center of town), but it stops running at four, so when we had to return for the 6:30 train, we had to walk the eight or nine blocks. Not bad, really.
We enjoyed hanging out in the Plaza, a very pretty center square, and then went to the Palace of the Governors which was the home to governors of New Mexico from 1620 to 1912, during the Spanish Colonial, Mexican, and American Territorial periods.
Then we went to the New Mexico History Museum, which is just across the courtyard from the Palace. There were exhibits on the history of New Mexico, beginning with the Native Americans, through the present. Some of the most interesting displays dealt with wealthy Jewish pioneers of New Mexico; lawlessness, banditry, and murder on the American frontier (19th Century); how New Mexico finally became the 47th state in 1912; Poncho Villa’s raid on Columbia (the only foreign invasion of the continental US during the 20th Century); the Navajo Code Talkers of WWII; security at the Manhattan Project; a very brief passing reference to a supposed UFO crash at Roswell in 1947; and a bit about hippie communes in the 60s.
We spent the rest of the afternoon wandering the area around the Plaza. We checked out the Native Americans selling jewelry and other crafts. We found a little café and got mochas. And we went into more than a dozen art galleries selling some of the most beautiful—but way too expensive—Southwestern and Native American art.
Sunday the 15th we went to the Indian Pueblo Cultural Center. This museum represents the nineteen Native American Pueblos of New Mexico. Debbie and I enjoyed the exhibits. The permanent exhibit showed the history of the Pueblos. We noted that there was quite a remarked similarity to that of Jewish history: oppression, persecution, religious intolerance, and forced conversion—mainly by the Spanish, but also Anglos as well.
There was also a neat display of contemporary arts and crafts of each of the 19 Pueblos. And there were two temporary exhibits. The one we really enjoyed was by a native artist named Kathleen Wall who sculpted Native American figures. Very interesting and moving. The second was about the patron saints of the Pueblos. During their forced conversion to Catholicism by the Spaniards, each pueblo was assigned a patron saint. I didn’t think much of forced conversion, but I supposed it’s a step up from just murdering them all, which other Spaniards tried to do.
There were some short movies demonstrating Native American craftsmanship. The first one we saw was about a famous potter who demonstrated an open ground firing without a kiln. The second was a famous Native American painter who made her own paints. It was very interesting.
We admired the murals in the courtyard and also bought some souvenirs in the gift shop.
Monday the 16th we went to Sandia Peak, one of the most gorgeous natural wonders I’ve ever seen in my life. The mountain towers above Albuquerque like a rocky sentinel.
We took the tram, which is a cable car, from the base at 6500 feet to the summit at 10,300 feet above sea level. The view going up is just amazing. Words can’t describe what it’s like to look down upon this mountain to see rocks and trees and snow. The further up you go, the more spectacular the scenery gets.
There was some snow at the top—it had snowed two days before—but it was not too deep. Debbie and I enjoyed exploring the summit and seeing so many incredible views, all around. (For me, it was even more amazing than Pike’s Peak, even though it wasn’t quite as high.) Took tons of pics.
There’s a restaurant up on the peak called High Finance—the most unique dining experience in Albuquerque. It wasn’t meal time—and we couldn’t really afford lunch or dinner because it’s so expensive—but in the lounge they serve drinks and appetizers. So we went into the lounge and got soup and nachos. A nice way to warm up (it was pretty cold up there—twenty nine degrees) and to enjoy the view from the summit.
The tram ride down, in the late afternoon, was even more gorgeous with the setting sun on the mountain. And when we got all the way down and left, the mountain turned pink. It was the pinkest we had seen the whole trip, so far. (The Sandia Mountains turn pink almost every day at sunset because of a particular mineral in the rock which looks pink in the sun’s slanted rays.)
That night there was a meteor shower and we saw a shooting star. It was quite a spectacular day.
Tuesday the 17th we went to the Anderson-Abruzzo Albuquerque International Balloon Museum at Balloon Fiesta Park. Did you know Albuquerque is the hot air balloon capital of the world, and every October they hold the world’s largest balloon gathering? A few times over the last two weeks, when I got up early enough, I could see balloons flying over the city in the early morning light from my hotel window.
The balloon museum was another thing that didn’t exist five years ago, when I was last here. It was very interesting. Debbie and I spent several hours there and enjoyed it. There were many exhibits on the history of ballooning, beginning with the first balloon flight in Paris in the 1780s. And there were displays about balloons used in warfare. And a recreation of the Double Eagle II, the first balloon to cross the Atlantic Ocean, in 1978, piloted by three men from Albuquerque. There was also a balloon flight simulator which I enjoyed playing with. I got a 76 out of 100 on it.
So that’s that. Debbie flew home the next morning. Overall, it was a good trip and I enjoyed my time with Debbie. I think Debbie enjoyed it too.
And I enjoyed New Mexico. I hope I have a chance to come back here again soon.
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| Wednesday, November 18th, 2009
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9:59 pm - Chizfilm Updated
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| Tuesday, November 10th, 2009
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12:33 am - The Land of Enchantment
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I’m in Albuquerque, New Mexico. The Land of Enchantment. It’s not just an advertising slogan; there’s something about New Mexico. It’s so beautiful. Especially this time of year, the autumn, when the cottonwood trees turn yellow. In the setting sun, they look golden. I’ve been admiring them all week. Them and the Sandia Mountains, of course, which are just gorgeous. I know the Colorado Rockies are taller; but for my money, the Sandias are more spectacular.
The main reason for coming here, of course, was to see if the drier climate would help my tinnitus. Well, I’ve been here over five days now and I’m not cured yet. I admit I was hoping for some miracle cure the instant I stepped off the plane. Obviously, that didn’t happen. I’ve had a few good days and a few bad days. I need to give it more time, to see how it goes.
Actually, Saturday was really bad. So bad, in fact, I didn’t leave the hotel room the entire day. But I am a lot better yesterday and today.
I’ve spent most of my time over the last five days just driving around, getting a feel of the place, and buying groceries. I got a hotel that’s supposed to have a kitchenette, but it’s really tiny and not set up for cooking. There’s no conventional oven. Neither is there a table and chairs. Little things like measuring cups and mixing bowls and sponge and soap, it doesn’t have, so I had to buy. I spent nearly $90 on groceries but it may be a waste. I may end up eating most of my meals out because cooking is so difficult. Oh well. At least there are plenty of restaurants nearby. Including a Cracker Barrel immediately next door to the hotel. I’ve eaten there twice already.
I’m not sure how many of the people reading this journal know this, but my family owns some land not far from here. It’s in an Albuquerque suburb called Rio Rancho. Perhaps “suburb” is the wrong word. It’s very rural. An acre of desert, way out in the middle of nowhere. Sixteen miles from town, seven of which is a dirt road. Three miles from the nearest building. This is rural with a capital R. And yet, in a way, it is rather pretty out there. My parents bought it in 1969, 40 years ago. Someday I’ll probably own it. It’s not worth much. Five years ago, it was valued at $1500. But it is land that we actually own, which I think is pretty cool.
I saw it for the first time five years ago, in 2004. My parents have never seen it. They’ve been paying property taxes on it for 40 years and have never set foot on it. Now, I have set foot on it three times. In 2004, a few months later in 2005, and again last Friday. It hasn’t changed much. There’s no building anywhere near this area. But maybe 20 or 30 years from now, it will be worth a lot more.
So that was Friday; the visit to my family’s land. Saturday was so bad, like I said, I didn’t leave the hotel. But I did watch that movie, “The Bubble” and wrote a review of it for my site, so the day wasn’t totally wasted. Yesterday I drove around some more and got very close to the mountains. I found a nice little place where the mountains meet the houses, parked the car, and took a ton of pics.
Today was my first real touristy day. I went to Petroglyph National Monument. It’s a National Park that has some ancient dead volcanoes—they stopped erupting tens of thousands of years ago, long before any humans lived in this area. It’s also filled with tons of petroglyphs, spiritual markings made by Pueblo Indians between 1300 and 1600. The Pueblos settled in the Rio Grande Valley between 1270 and 1300 because of a widespread drought and needed to be near a permanent water source—what today we call the Rio Grande River. They build a complex culture. They lived in cities with pueblos three or four stories high. They thrived until about 1600 when they warred with Spanish settlers. Most of them were killed or converted to Catholicism. (As a Jew, whose ancestors were forced to convert or die by the Inquisition, that’s something I can strongly sympathize with.)
Anyway, the rock formations, which were a result of the volcanic activity thousands of years before, were relatively soft and easy to carve. The Pueblos carved shaped of animals, humans, and geometric designs into the rocks. No one today knows exactly why, but they do know that they have deep spiritual significance.
So anyway, I got to the park about 2:15. I went to the Visitors Center and had a nice chat with the park ranger. I told her I wanted to see petroglyphs and the volcanoes. She said I could do both if I rushed, since they close at 5. I decided I didn’t really want to rush, so I’ll do the volcanoes another time. The ranger told me the best place to see petroglyphs is at Boca Negra Canyon, about a 7 or 8 minute drive from the Visitors Center, going outside the park and then back in.
The Boca Negra Canyon is a very steep trail. Very narrow and rocky, from the bottom to the top of a mesa, almost like scaling up a cliff. I hadn’t realized how strenuous a climb it would be. It took an hour-and-a-half to go up and down. But it was definitely worth it. There were dozens of petroglyphs of many different designs. The majority of them were along the bottom or top, much fewer in the middle, so there was not much to see as I climbed through the middle of the trail. And yet, the higher I climbed, the more amazing the view got. I could see more and more of Albuquerque.
When I finally got to the top of the mesa, the view was just incredible. I could see the entire Rio Grande Valley, from the north to the south. Maybe 150 miles. Maybe more. It was so beautiful looking at the golden foliage along the river, the rising desert, the magnificent rocky mountains walling in the valley. To the west, the volcanoes silhouetted against the open sky. One of the most gorgeous sights I have seen in years.
I tried to imagine myself a Pueblo Indian, 500 years ago, climbing that cliff and seeing that view—instead of modern housing, pueblo cities dotting the landscape. I had come up to commune with my gods, to carve their image in the rocks, ask them for guidance in living my life.
It was a great experience. I hope to post some pictures soon.
I’ll be here another two weeks. Debbie is joining me on Wednesday and will stay for a week. I’m looking forward to seeing more of Albuquerque with her, and also being platonic friends.
Tomorrow I’m hoping to go to the Art and History museum. Hopefully I’ll have a chance to write about that soon.
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| Sunday, November 8th, 2009
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10:26 pm - Chizfilm Updated
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| Tuesday, November 3rd, 2009
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4:52 pm - A Visit to a Federal Prison
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I haven’t updated since I broke up with Debbie a few weeks ago. I’m now in Florida and I’ve been staying with my parents. I’ve been here just under a week. My tinnitus was bad the day I flew down, but then was pretty good for the next few days. Yesterday it got really bad and today it is still bad. I have little doubt that the humidity has something to do with it, but clearly is not the only factor. I think stress makes it bad and yesterday was stressful day. Yesterday I went to a federal prison to see my friend Kris, who has been there since May. I’ve been wanting to come to Florida to see him ever since then (actually, I’d been wanting to see him ever since his arrest two years ago—he spent the first year-and-a-half in a jail in Las Vegas), but travel has been very difficult for me, as you know.
But finally, yesterday, I got to see him at last. My mom drove out there with me. My Dad, who’s a bit paranoid about prisons, didn’t want me to go alone, so he made my Mom go with me. Actually, truth be told, I was rather glad of it, to have her for company. Especially since she did the long-distance driving, which is difficult for me now, given my tinnitus. It was also nice to have her for moral support. You know, it’s not an easy thing, at least for some people, to walk into a federal prison.
The prison, which is at a place called Coleman, is an hour-and-fifteen minutes from where my parents live. My mom and I left at 10:30. We stopped for lunch at a McDonald’s along the way, in Okahumpka, a town 15 minutes in the opposite direction from the prison, and arrived there about 12:45, or so.
There are actually four separate prisons in the Coleman Prison complex and Kris is at the Low Security facility. We found his facility fine, but at first we weren’t aloud in. When we got out of the car and started to walk to the building, a guard with a huge shotgun told us to return to our vehicle because the lobby was temporarily closed. I asked for how long and he said he didn’t know.
So we sat in the car for ten minutes. Then we tried again and again the guard said it was still closed. We went back to the car. I began to fear that I had come all this way only to be stopped because of some security problem. What would I tell Kris?
Anyway, after another 5 minutes, the guard yelled to us that it was clear and we could enter.
As I had been instructed in advance, I left everything in the car. My wallet and cellphone were locked in the glove compartment. Everything else—from my comb to my keys to my watch and ring—were on the backseat underneath a towel. All I had with me was the clothes on my back plus $20 in singles (which I had been told I could bring), my driver’s license, and a little piece of paper with Kris’ 8-didget number on it. I gave my mom my car key; she held on to that for me since she wasn’t going in.
I approached the front desk and told them I wished to visit a prisoner and gave Kris’ name. I was asked if I was sure that he was at the Low [security] complex and I said yes. I was given a form to fill out. My mom and I went into an adjacent waiting area while I filled out the form. Then I turned it in and gave them my driver’s license. I was told to wait and they would call me when ready.
It was only 4 or 5 minutes. I said goodbye to my mom at that point—she would spend the next two hours sitting in this room all by herself reading a book.
The contents of my pockets—the $20 and the piece of paper with Kris’ number on it—were searched, and the money was counted. I took off my belt and shoes—they were x-rayed like at the airport. The guards were polite and friendly to me. I was the only one there at that hour so I guess they were bored and happy to have something to do.
After I put on my shoes and belt, I was asked to sign a book with my name, Kris’ name, his number, and the time of arrival. Then I was told to sit and wait. I had all of one minute to wait. (Apparently at busier times, the wait is much longer.)
Then I had my right hand stamped with a stamp that only shows up under ultraviolet light. It would be checked several times to make sure that I was the visitor and not an inmate attempting an escape.
The woman guard could tell, I guess, that it was my first time there because I was obviously unfamiliar with the procedure. (Apparently the vast majority of visitors come frequently and know exactly what to do.) “First time?” she said. “Yes. In fact, this is the first time in my life I have ever been inside a prison.” “Well, welcome to prison,” she smiled.
Then the woman guard took me outside and I had to walk down this long, wide sidewalk, through a courtyard connecting buildings. I was told that I need to walk along a line on the left side of the path. The reason for this was because usually there are large groups of more than a dozen visitors and they need to be easily identified; since I was the only visitor at that moment, it was not necessary, but still regulations are regulations. At least she explained it to me and I appreciated that.
Finally I reached the visitation room. The door (as every single door in prison) is always locked, so she unlocked it, let me in, and locked it behind me. She pointed out the visitor bathroom (inmates have a separate bathroom that is under constant surveillance—they are not allowed to use visitor bathrooms) and told me to take a seat; Kris should be there soon.
The visitation room is a large room—perhaps 150 to 200 seats and a low table for every three chairs. There are red lines about 25 feet from the door that prisoners are not allowed to cross. There are also red lines surrounding the vending machines on the opposite side of the room that prisoners may not cross. Only visitors can use vending machines and only visitors can use money, although visitors can give the food they buy to the inmates.
There is a guard station in one corner of the room—there were four or five guards there. They were not all over—just generally surveying the general goings-on to make sure no one was violating any of the rules. I didn’t feel it was intrusive at all.
The room was about two-thirds full. Kris had told me Mondays and Fridays are the best days to come; on the weekends it’s way too crowded.
I had about 2 or 3 minutes to wait until Kris came in. It was just 1:30—about 45 minutes after my mom and I had gotten to the prison—that included the waiting time in the parkinglot. So overall, the wait was not so bad at all—I had been warned it could take an hour to process me. I guess I came at a good time. I had an hour-and-a-half for my visit.
When I saw Kris enter and he saw me, his face lit up. That made me smile. I was so afraid that I might break into tears when I first saw him (this is, after all, the first time I’ve seen him in person since his arrest). But I didn’t. I wasn’t at all as emotionally overwhelming as I expected. It was Kris, my old friend, whom I had been with hundreds of times. Not quite like old times, but there was some of that sense, that sense that it was great to be in his presence. Kris had always made me feel good to be around him, and after two years of being incarcerated, he still had that. He smiled and it was just great to see him. We hugged for a while and it felt really good to have my arms around him. Just to physically touch him after all this was a good feeling.
Kris was wearing his drab olive-green uniform. It didn’t look so bad. We sat down and we talked for a few minutes. Then he took me to a bulletin board with photos of the complex and he showed me pictures of his rec area and his sleeping room and cafeteria and other things. They looked nice and clean. I asked him if it was cleaned up for the photo and he said no, it’s a pretty accurate representation. I was glad of it. It’s far far far far far better than what he was suffering in the jail in Vegas.
Then we had our photo taken. He’ll get a copy and I’ll get a copy. It cost Kris a dollar.
Then I bought him some food. I went to the vending machines and bought him a rootbeer, some cheetoes, and a chocolate pie. About an hour later, I bought him more of the same.
The rest of the time was talking talking talking. Where do I begin? We talked about many of his friends who have not contacted him, or broken off communications. Reminisced about old mutual friends. And I caught him up on my life—my tinnitus, my website, and my breakup with Debbie. He was quite sympathetic to my problems. I appreciated that, considering the problems he has.
We talked about many of his fellow inmates—what they were in for and their sentences which, he felt in many cases, were unjust. Most people in prison admit their crimes; a few insist they are innocent, he says. About half of the 1200 prisoners in the Low Security complex are in there merely for possession of drugs. They talk about politics inside; everyone (of the prisoners) agrees that sentences are far too strict. They are well aware that the US has far more prisoners per capita than any other country. If they want to relieve prison crowding—which is a serious problem on the inside although most people on the outside don’t consider it a serious problem—make possession a misdemeanor. It would free up half the beds.
Kris told me that sometimes he gets really depressed when he starts to think that he’ll be there for another seven years. Still, it’s 100 times better than the Las Vegas jail. It’s good that he’s in the Low Security section—those in the medium and high security section have it much worse. And he says most of the prisoners there are very well behaved because they know if they don’t behave, they’ll be transferred to medium or high.
Toward the end of our visit, Kris thanked me for sticking by him all this time. And he got a little emotional when he said it. I wasn’t expecting him to say so; I did what I had to do. He had been a good friend to me for 13 years, how could I not stick by him?
At 3:00 it was announced that visitation was over. I gave Kris a long hug and told him that hopefully I’ll see him again the Monday after Thanksgiving. He had to go to one side of the room and wait to be taken back; I went with the remaining 2 dozen visitors to the area by the door.
One by one, we were called. We had to show our stamp under the ultraviolet light. Then wait again in a separate group. Then we were walked back—single file on the one side of the sidewalk, to the entrance building. There we had to show our stamp again. Then we were asked to sign out, with our time, in the book which we had signed in. Mine was the last name on the list, which means I was the very last visitor of the day.
At the front desk, I was given my drivers license back. Then I met my mom, and we left. It was 3:15. We were home by 4:30.
Overall, it really wasn’t an unpleasant experience. I was glad I had gone and I’m looking forward to seeing Kris again in four weeks. But it’s a bit depressing and I just wish somehow there was more I could do for him.
Tomorrow I’m flying to New Mexico. Hopefully I’ll have a better outlook out there. It should be bright and sunny and dry. And a whole new world to explore.
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| Sunday, November 1st, 2009
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12:41 pm - Chizfilm Updated
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| Tuesday, October 27th, 2009
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2:23 am - Chizfilm Updated
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| Friday, October 23rd, 2009
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2:01 pm - Ask Me a Question Meme
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Several of my LJ friends are doing this; I may as well, too.
The problem with LJ: We all think we are so close, but really we know nothing about one another. So I want you to ask me something you think you should know about me. Something that should be obvious, but you have no idea about. Ask away.
Then post this in your LJ and find out what people don't know about you.
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| Wednesday, October 21st, 2009
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10:54 pm - Chizfilm Updated
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| Sunday, October 18th, 2009
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1:10 pm - The New Chizfilm
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Officially announcing:
I have just re-launched my website after an extensive overhaul. It has now been redubbed “Chizfilm Jewish Movie Reviews.” Check it out:
http://www.chizfilm.net/
My first Jewish movie review of the revised site is my favorite documentary of all time, “Hiding and Seeking: Faith and Tolerance After the Holocaust.” Check it out here:
http://www.chizfilm.net/hideseek.html
I’m anxious to know what you all think of the new site.
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| Saturday, October 17th, 2009
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3:18 pm - All Good Things ...
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You know the saying, “All good things must come to an end.”
When last I updated, two weeks ago, I wrote how much I was looking forward to going up to New York last weekend to see Debbie and take in some of the sights. Well, that didn’t happen. We broke up instead. It’s been pretty painful.
I’m not going to go into the details. Let’s just say that long distance relationships are very difficult. Both Debbie and I have tried very hard to deal with all the obstacles over the last two-and-a-half years, but in the end we eventually came to realize that there were just too many fundamental differences standing in the way of our relationship progressing.
Despite the bad aspects, I don’t regret a single moment of my time with Debbie. I loved her deeply and still do. And I know she loves me. And we both have some amazing memories.
The good news is that in the last week, we have been very cordial to each other and have decided to remain friends. Platonic friends. I am very glad of this because it’s hard for me to imagine my life without her in it.
You may recall that I had mentioned that Debbie and I were planning on meeting up in New Mexico next month. After some discussion, we have decided to go ahead with the plans, since she already had her tickets. She just won’t spend quite as long and we’ll stay in different rooms—in fact, different hotels, across the street from each other. There are several advantages to this. I’ll have some company while I’m out there, Debbie will get to see all the fun sight-seeing things which we had both gotten excited about, and we’ll have a chance to work on being “just friends.” I think this a good thing; I’m rather pleased with this resolution. Had I gone out there by myself, I’d be spending two weeks down in the dumps, lonely.
So yea, I’m quite upset by this turn of events, but I’m pushing through. I took advantage of the time to myself this last week to finish up I’m Off Then, the book I’ve been reading and enjoying. Actually, I still have about 25 pages left to go; I’ve been taking these last pages slowly because I don’t want it to end. However, there are some places where I doubt the accuracy of the translation.
I’ve also been working on making those changes to Chizfilm which I mentioned in my last post. The overhaul is just about done; expect the re-launch of the website either late tonight or tomorrow. I hope you all like it; I’m anxious for your feedback.
In other news, the weather has been just terrible here these last 5 or 6 days. Cold and rainy. It’s been effecting my tinnitus something awful. They say on Monday it should clear up; I hope that will make a difference.
The weather has also been bad for my daily exercise. Climbing up and down the hill has been extremely unpleasant in this weather so, the last few days, I went to the clubhouse and discovered they had a treadmill in their exercise room. I’ve been experimenting with that. I don’t know if it’s really giving me the same kind of workout I get from going up and down the hill, but at least I am sweating like crazy after using it for 35 to 40 minutes. That was, after all, what my Chinese doctor told me to do. Still, I’m looking forward to the weather clearing—I’d rather be on the real hill than a simulated one on the treadmill.
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(14 comments | comment on this)
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| Tuesday, October 6th, 2009
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2:35 pm - Chizfilm Updated
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| Monday, October 5th, 2009
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5:04 pm - Feeling Better: An Update on the Last Two Weeks
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As promised, here’s an update on what’s been going on these last two weeks, since I wrote a real entry.
First of all, my tinnitus. It’s better and it’s worse. I have good days and I have bad days. The last three days have been good ones. There are more good than bad now, and the bad days aren’t as horrible as at the beginning. When the ringing is loud, it’s just constantly annoying, as opposed to completely debilitating and destructive. On the good days, when the volume is low, I can pretty much ignore it and get on with life. So despite the bad days, there is definite general long-term improvement. How much of this is due to my TCM treatments and other lifestyle changes, I cannot be sure. Perhaps there’d be improvement if I’d done nothing. Who knows?
Still, I am far from cured. I’ve had 14 TCM treatments. Dr. Chang had originally told me it would take a dozen to cure me. Now he says 15 is the limit. Whatever cannot be cured by 15 treatments will not be cured, so there is no point in continuing after the last one, on Wednesday. I may be stuck with this the rest of my life. At least life is far more livable now than it was several months ago.
Of course, I want to get rid of the tinnitus entirely, if possible. One day, about a week-and-a-half ago, it suddenly occurred to me that if my tinnitus is worse on rainy, humid days, I might be far more comfortable living my life in a place with a drier climate. This brings me to Albuquerque.
Very few of my LJ friends were with me back when I started this blog, in 2005, and those few who were have probably forgotten, so I’m going to retell a tiny bit of my life’s story, now:
Six years ago, in 2004, for many reasons, I decided to leave Florida. I looked into a half-dozen places to relocate to. One of them was Albuquerque, near where my family owns some land. I visited in late 04 and again in February 05. I was very impressed. By early 06, I had narrowed down my choice to two places: Albuquerque or Charlottesville. In fact, I was leaning toward Albuquerque, but for a few various reasons I ended up choosing Charlottesville.
I’ve been here since July 2006 and, for the most part, I love Charlottesville. But while it’s certainly not Florida, it is still much more damp than New Mexico, which has very low humidity rates. If, and that’s a very big IF, I feel better and healthier in Albuquerque because my tinnitus is hardly noticeable most of the time, than perhaps I should consider relocating.
So I have decided to go out to New Mexico next month and hang out there for two-and-a-half weeks. I’ll see how I feel. I’ll take another look at the city and see how it’s changed in the last five years, and remind myself what I liked so much about it. And, also, what I didn’t like. And we’ll see. Maybe I won’t feel any different. Maybe I’ll decide I just don’t want to live there. By Thanksgiving, I’ll know.
The good news is that Debbie has ten days of vacation in November, so she’ll be able to fly out to Albuquerque and meet me there. I’m particularly looking forward to taking her to the top of Sandia Peak, a 10,000 foot mountain next to Albuquerque. It is incredibly beautiful and I consider it one of the most amazing natural wonders I have ever seen.
The bad news, I’m afraid, is that I’m going to have to miss the Virginia Film Festival. That pretty much sucks. I’m on the staff and I paid my dues by writing up two blurbs for the program. It’s one of my favorite annual events; I always look forward to meeting filmmakers and seeing excellent films that cannot be seen anywhere else. But it’s impossible to be in two places at the same time. This trip to New Mexico, at this moment, is more important.
So, what else? There are plenty of other things going on. For one thing, I started exercising. On the advice of my Chinese doctor, who mentioned that it would help, for the first time a few weeks ago. I started working out two weeks ago and have been managing to do it about five days a week.
Now I’m an overweight couch-potato who never exercised regularly in my life (except for a half-dozen brief periods over that last 25 years that never lasted more than a few weeks before giving up). So I have quite a lot to make up for, and my early attempts at this might be described as pathetic by those in much better shape. But I think I’m off to a great start, considering where I’m coming from. I manage about a half-hour a day; I work up quite a sweat and fast pulse. And although I haven’t actually weighed myself to see if I’ve lost a pound or two, I have noticed that in the last few days I’ve had to tighten my belt an extra notch. So maybe I have lost a little weight.
Since I don’t belong to any fancy, expensive club, I get my exercise the cheap way. I walk up and down the steep hill where I live. Granted, it’s only a quarter-mile from top to bottom, but it is very steep and I go up and down twice, so that’s a mile. When I first started, I only did it once. After a few days, it was one-and-a-half times. My goal is to do it three times. Once that becomes easier, than I’ll start jogging up and down. Wish me luck.
For years, people have been urging me to get regular exercise but I’ve never been able to motivate myself to do it for very long. But now, when I’m told that it could help get rid of the tinnitus, well, that’s a very strong motivation. Because I’ll do anything to hear silence again. Let me tell you, you don’t know how dear silence can be until it is robbed from you.
The other added benefit is that it gets me outside in this lovely fall weather. In the last week-and-a-half, the temperatures have started to drop, the air is less humid, and views—particularly from the top of the hill where you can see much of the city of Charlottesville and the Blue Ridge Mountains beyond—are just beautiful. The trees are just starting to change color. The majority are still green, but here and there, some are showing color and that gives me a bit of joy. When I was a child, growing up in New Jersey, the autumn was always my favorite season. I dare say it still is. And I kind of like having the excuse to go out into it.
In other news, I started reading an interesting book called I’m Off Then by Hape Kerkeling. It was a birthday gift from my friend ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) sallycandance. Thanks, Sally. It was written in German but has been translated into English. Although I had never heard of him before, apparently Hape is an extremely popular comedian in Germany and this book is a bestseller. It’s a journal of his personal journey along the Camino de Santiago, a pilgrimage trail along the north of Spain—a walk of nearly 800 miles from the Pyrenees to the town of Santiago where a Catholic saint is buried. According to the Catholic Church, anyone who walks it will have their sins forgiven. I’m only 50 pages into the book, but I’m very much enjoying it so far. Just like me, Hape has a lot of issues in his life that he needs to work out; this journey of self-discovery will hopefully help him. And because he’s a comedian, the book is also told in an amusing manner. I may write more about it later, as I go along. I’m reading about a chapter a day. Thanks again, Sally.
Also, as I think I mentioned before, I’ve gotten re-involved with the Jewish Film Festival Committee. Working with this committee is fun and exciting. We’ve screened several films in the last several weeks—two at my apartment. We’re starting to narrow down the list. We’ve rejected “The Believer,” over my sole voice of dissent, but everyone loved the comedy “Sixty Six,” so that’s pretty much a definite, assuming we get permission. We’ll also probably show the Israeli film, “Walk on Water.” We’re seriously considering the possibility of bringing in Barry Levinson and showing his “Liberty Heights” and “Avalon.” I don’t know how likely that is to happen, realistically, but it’s certainly fun to think about.
We’re also dealing with other, more practical, details. We’ve finally settled on a date (the 29th of April through the 2nd of May) and are now discussing what sort of opening night reception/party we’d like to put on, and where. The venue is still up in the air, but that question will be settled soon, hopefully.
As for Chizfilm, well, I’m forced to admit now that the three-year experiment has been a failure. Although I’ve really enjoyed doing it, it just hasn’t been attracting anywhere near the least amount of attention I’ve hoped for. I’ve spent three times as much money advertising it as it’s taken in. I recently revived it after its dormancy over the summer due to my illness, but the three articles I just wrote, including the one on the local producer and the very controversial one on Roman Polanski, just didn’t get any results.
But before I completely bury it, I’m going to try one more experiment, radically altering its focus. I’ll spotlight only Jewish films and advertise the site to the Jewish community; see if that will bring it any more success. I’ll give it six to nine months to see if there is any improvement.
But before I make the change, there are still one or two things I need to do, in its current format. So you can expect the change within a month. Or maybe I’ll just wait until I get back from Albuquerque. We’ll see. I have no specific timetable for the change.
And one last thing before I sign off. I’m going up to New York this coming weekend to see Debbie. It’s Columbus Day weekend and Debbie has three days off. I’m excited. It will have been less than a month since I will have seen her, but I miss her. I can’t wait to see her again. It will also be the first time I’ll have been to New York in over a year. Up until a year ago, I was going every two to three months, but within the last year, it just didn’t happen. Debbie came here to Virginia several times, twice we met up near Baltimore, once we met in Washington, once we went to Florida, and once we went to Colorado. I probably would have gone to New York over the summer, but my tinnitus was killing me and I wasn’t up to traveling. Plus I had my sick father to deal with.
So I’m really looking forward to being in New York this weekend, even though it will only be for a few days. I had hoped to attend the New York Film Festival (Pedro Almodóvar will be there) but unfortunately everything sold out quickly, so that won’t happen. But we’re planning some fun things anyway. We hope to visit the United Nations Building (I saw it over two years ago, but Debbie never has—plus we don’t know how long it will be there since they are building a new headquarters for the UN). One day we’ll go to New Jersey to visit my friend Barry. And we’ll eat at Alba’s, our favorite restaurant. And also, I hope, we’ll take a stroll in Central Park. Perhaps go rowing on the lake. I bet the fall leaves will be just incredible this time of year.
So, that’s that. For the moment, my life’s pretty good right now. Though certainly far from fantastic, it’s the best it’s been since the tinnitus started in May. Let’s hope it continues to get better.
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2:06 pm - Congratulations to My Friend Ben
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It’s been two weeks since I last made a real update to LJ, and I promise that very soon, perhaps later today, I’ll write a long post to let everyone know how I’m doing (better, BTW), what I’ve been up to, and my plans for the immediate future. First, however, I just want to make a brief post to congratulate my friend Ben.
Some of you may remember that Ben got admitted to the Florida Bar last April and I was privileged to be present at his swearing-in ceremony. Well, in the time since, he has been hired by the city of Orlando to serve as a public defender.
Now some people think that the job of a PD is to get the guilty off. That’s not true at all. Although most of Ben’s clients are, in fact, guilty, his job is to protect their rights and serve as a check against the police and prosecution, so that they don’t get out of hand in their blind zeal. In other words, Ben makes sure that justice is meted out fairly. For that alone, I am proud of him.
Once in a while, as hard as it may be for some conservatives to believe, the police actually arrest an innocent person. Recently, Ben had such a client. He was accused of loitering and something else—I forget the exact legal charge—but it is basically a vague term for acting suspicious. What the police said he did was go through a parkinglot checking car doors to see if they were locked or not. Ben’s client said the whole thing was a misunderstanding—he was looking for the person who was supposed to give him a ride. After extensive interviews, and his client’s outright refusal to accept a plea-bargain, Ben came to believe that he was innocent. So he went to trial.
The trial was last week, and Ben made his case. The trial lasted for several hours; the jury was out for only fifteen minutes. I don’t know what the average time for jury-deliberation is, but fifteen minutes is extremely tiny. They came back with a unanimous verdict of not-guilty.
So congratulations, Ben. I’m very proud of you. May you have many more successful trials to come, in the pursuit of fair justice!
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